Sports: Appropriate Names

The baseball trade deadline brought some sport-appropriate names. I never thought of Eric Gagne until the Rangers traded him to Boston. He should really play in Montreal (his hometown), where they would appreciate that "gagner" is the French for "to win".

The Yankees acquired Wilson Betemit. He should do an ad for Wilson gloves, saying, "It's a better mitt."

And how come no one ever suggested Dave Winfield? His surname can be read as "win" + "field", or "W" + "infield". Did you know he's one of two players to be drafted by three different pro sports (and a fourth as a publicity stunt)?

New Ranger Neftali Feliz doesn't have an appropriate name (I think), but I propose we call him "Netflix". (I like how Baseball Prospectus shows an image that says, "We don't have a picture of this guy", with an "alt" tag of "He's probably very handsome".)

But the Rangers' biggest coup was getting the player with the longest surname in MLB history, Jarrod Saltalamacchia. The cameras caught him laughing with Kameron Loe in the dugout tonight about their discrepancy in name length. His name is an anagram of "Maharaja's Radical Clot".