TV: Round-Up

• "Heroes" is still good but the first crack appeared with the casting of Eric Roberts as a senior figure in the "conspiracy". I could buy him as a druggie loser, or a loser who gets hooked on drugs, or the drug-addled brother of a famous actress, but as someone who's expected to keep secrets? Not buying it.
  
• Saw a Fox 4 News report on Texas Pacific's buyout of TXU. When they mentioned co-founder David Bonderman, they showed a close-up of a grainy newspaper photo! Delightfully chintzy!
  
• This isn't mentioned on Ed Bark's DFW TV Blog, but it's well worth reading for his put-downs of NBC5 and their "Four Horsepeople of the Apocalypse".
  
• Funniest recent line on "The Colbert Report"? "But some people don't want to see Harriet Tubman on a space train."
  

Music: Wilco

The cover of the new Wilco album (and tracklisting) at The Line Of Best Fit.

Movies: Oscars 2007

Some hardy souls are live-blogging the Oscars. I was curious to read what they had to say about Leonardo DiCarprio's near-fellatio of Al Gore.

• Entertainment Weekly. They note that during the Al & Leo bit:
  

  In the audience, Jerry Seinfeld seems ready to roll his eyes.

  
  
• Those professional snarks at Defamer.
  

  Despite Leo DiCaprio's prompting, Al Gore does not announce his candidacy for the presidential race, explaining, "I'm f***ing terrifed of David Geffen calling me a fatty in the New York Times tomorrow."

  
  
• The Onion Av Club's The Hater. I think this is sarcasm:
  

  Al Gore just made a funny, y'all!

  
  
• The Onion's clueless Entertainment columnist, Jackie Harvey. Didn't mention Leo & Al, but had this great line:
  

  Melissa Etheridge could make the phone book interesting if you showed it on screen behind her while she was performing.

  
  
• The Answer May Surprise You may be the puniest live-blog ever.
  

  While I was outside, I apparently missed a very funny exchange between Leo DiCaprio and Al Gore. Something about the environment or running for president or something. My mom tried to recap it for me, but I think she's high.

  
  

Nobody mentioned that Gore has Ted Kennedy's Disease aka "Fat Head".

Magazines: Punch

Project Guterberg has some old issues of Punch available for your perusal, including December 29th, 1920. It includes such rib-ticklers as this:

A woman informed a London magistrate last Tuesday that her husband thrashed her at Easter, Whitsuntide and on August Bank Holiday. Our thoughts were constantly with her during the recent Yuletide festivities.

It is stated that rabies does not exist in Ireland. Our opinion is that it wouldn't be noticed if it did.

"Leather is now much cheaper," we read. Yet we have noticed no drop in the price of restaurant steak.

A vast improvement on 1892:

A Gentleman, whose name is well known in scientific circles, vouches for the following fact. He was, he says, passing a poulterer's shop, when he actually saw a hare buy a rabbit!! He subsequently added, that much depended on the way of spelling "buy."

Celebrities: Jessica Simpson

Apparently, Jessica Simpson is allergic to pizza. I really didn't think she looked that good in the 2007 Superbowl commercial for Pizza Hut - as one commenter says, "what's up with the clown lipstick?"

Music: Lose An "I", Part 2

AKA "Eric's Revenge". Eric supplies these 3 (with some modifications by me):

1. Dyslexic Acura model needs you tonight.
   
2. Silent decay of Glam Metal band.
   
3. 80s singer (with the Cruisers) helps collect taxes.
   

That last one does not refer to Eddie and the Cruisers. It's a singer I have never heard of, which is weird. And I've never heard his best known song.

Music: Add A "U"

Name these bands with an added "U":

1. Sports coat I wear to funeral of Kentucky band?
   
2. Modem manufacturer feels like making love?
   
3. UK punk band adopts sexual position with killer whale?
   

Music: Time Reporting

Headline on Pitchfork: "Pumpkins, Wilco, Ted Leo Added to Primavera". At last, I said to myself, I'll be able to charge time to listening to "Being There". Turns out to be a music festival in Barcelona.

Music: Lose An "I"

Name these artists/bands who have lost an "i"?

1. Do these Oklahoma weirdos set vinyl on fire?
   
2. "Guitar George" may know all the chords, but these guys play really bad Fenders.
   
3. Red-haired bottleneck guitarist joins Glam Metal band.
   
4. 80s avant-garde funk outfit seeks the return of a big green ogre.
   

Video: Girls, Girls, Girls

• The late Anna Nicole Smith in Bryan Ferry's video for "Will You STill Love Me Tomorrow?". (Idolator)
  
• Ali Larter (now on "Heroes") naked (with black bars) in a commercial for body spray. (AdFreak)
  
• Vanessa Paradis (Mrs. Johnny Depp) in the video for her song, "Be My Baby".
  
• More French pop: Axel Red sings "Rester Femme".
  
• Belinda Carlisle sings in French on her new album, but I can't find any vids - instead, a cover of Coldplay's "The Scientist".
  
• The Smithereens with Belinda Carlisle! "Blue Period".
  
• Beyonce and J. Lo (and an American Football player) in a Japanese Pepsi ad.
  
• Japanese bra ad.
  
• Carla Bruni (Italian/French model/singer) sings "If You Were Coming In The Fall".
  

Music: Covers With Original Artist

What cover versions have the original artist doing backing vocals/playing an instrument?

• All of The Smiths appear on Sandie Shaw's version of "Hand In Glove".
  
• Tom Petty sings backup on Johnny Cash's cover of "I Won't Back Down"
  
• Jane Birkin covered Roxy Music's "In Every Dreamhome A Heartache" as a duet with Bryan Ferry.
  
• When Whitney Houston covered Annie Lennox's 'Step by Step', Annie provided the backing vocals.
  

Placenames: Tautology

Tautologous place names:

• Highland Heights, OH
  
• Grange Farm, England
  
• Cove Bay, Scotland
  

Wikipedia list.

Media: Michael Ware

I just saw CNN's Iraq reporter Michael Ware for the first time. What a creepy guy! Mis-shapen face, 5 o'clock shadow, crazy eyes, speaks in strangulated Strine.

Here he is clean-shaven and talking about his 2004 kidnapping. As a commenter says, "Finally!!!! A rare shot of Michael Ware's elusive left nostril!!!!"

What does the internet think "Michael Ware is"? "...an Australian journalist reporting for CNN", "...Super-Shrill", "...a courageous, honorable and truthful reporter", "no Sean Flynn no matter how many times he reads 'Dispatches'", "...a traitor to the US", "...the shizz", "...accused in more than 40 break-ins".

Cryptic Crossword: 11x5

It's my widest crossword yet!

1		2		3		4		5		6
7
8

Across

1. Secret family of French children's author. (11)
7. Direction to corner of Pacific Avenue and Marvin Gardens. (2,3,4,2)
8. Hopes report cleared up the air we breathe. (11)

Down

1. One training for "An Officer, Not A Gentleman" gets "Alien" sequel. (5)
2. Test for fetal problems is extracted from groin, marked, and put back. (5)
3. Heavy metal singer embraces abstainer - "Same again!" (5)
4. Small instrument girl found in "Vanity Fair". (5)
5. Offspring put into circulation. (5)
6. Reduced in rank, Doctor of Divinity leaves to behave theatrically. (5)