Ideas: Brilliant

Two brilliant ideas, free to you, the general public.

• You know how hard it is to gauge the dress code for certain situations? A night at the symphony, dinner at a sit-down restaurant, the funeral of a hippy. I have the perfect solution: wear a clown costume. No one is going to say, "Excuse me, sir, but you should be wearing a formal clown suit." (Robb disagrees, pointing out that some clown suits are formal.)
  
• You know that mist that forms in the neck of a beer bottle when you pop the top? I say we save it up, and send it to drought-ravaged areas of the world. I'm keeping mine in a mason jar in my freezer.