Offers: Binding

I would like to make the following binding offers:

• To LL Cool J, $100 if he records a song entitled, "By All Means Call It A Comeback".
  
• To Sen. Tom Daschle, $500 if he uses as his campaign slogan, "A Little Daschle Do Ya!" (It would make a good pick-up line too. Maybe he should pay me.)
  
• To Paris Hilton, $1 if she starts saying "That's so Raven" instead of "That's hot".
  
• To Harry Houdini, $325 if he sends a message from beyond the grave using Instant Messenger.
  
• To the guy who operates the Euless warning siren, $4.80 if, the next time we're under a tornado watch, he plays "Turkey In The Straw" instead.
  
• To Ellen Burstyn, $75,000 if she marries Michael Jackson's chimp and changes her name to Ellen Burstyn-Bubbles.